Here's a totally non-sarcastic pro tip for anyone starting a diet in the new year: Just shut the fuck up about it. You gain nothing by announcing you're doing keto, whole 30, or whatever else, unless you just really need a peanut gallery of people telling you why diet X is bad.

I did keto for almost five years. I just told people I had a gluten allergy, which no one ever questioned. Friends of mine who announce they're doing keto on FB, comparatively, get fuckin' lambasted by the armchair crew.

I figure at 35 my life is way more than half over so I probably should stop being like "I'm glad I didn't get that tattoo because it would have been really dumb" and YOLO a little harder.

Eli Hodapp boosted

Boost if you’re dumb as hell, fav if you’re only dumb trying to get a headcount

Eli Hodapp boosted
Eli Hodapp boosted

ok failed the #NoPiss challenge for the month. just cant stop drinking pee!

I'm trying to ween myself off of using my Mac because Apple's modern laptops are so shitty and I don't know what specific thing is different about the OS UI of Mac OS vs Windows 10 but I feel like I'm just constantly losing Chrome tabs and will inadvertently have 600 different windows open, all of which have the same thing, because I just opened a new Gmail tab since I couldn't find the old one.

I guess getting drunk and buying people custom made trophies is my new thing.

Eli Hodapp boosted

you might not have known this, but google - the company you use for searching, email, maps, translation, data storage, watching videos, voice assistant tech, backing up your phone, storing photos, finding images, making purchases, making your phone's operating system, advertising, providing webfonts, running website analytics, providing captcha authentication, and browsing the internet - might be tracking you

Made the mistake of reading our YouTube comments.

Always awesome watching Starz shows at the gym, all of which are effectively softcore porn. I’m never sure what the proper protocol is for a gangbang scene popping up on your iPad while you’re running on a treadmill.

Happy Holidays to everyone on the ‘don.

Just saw a rip and reupload of Mark Rober’s glitter bomb video on Facebook with 6m views and 50k shares. That’s roughly $10-12k worth of ad views some random dude stole from him by not just linking to the original video instead. It’s pretty unreal how this behavior is just ... normal.

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